top of page
Search
Writer's pictureVanessa Reyes

Stop the Tags: We Are Who We Are.


One look at me, and you'll probably think that I'm either African-American or from India. I have been asked if I am mixed race. Although at first it bothered me when people would identify me as something that I am not, I have learned to not let it get to me. I identify myself as how I see fit. I am Dominican.

I am proud of my roots and culture as well as being from a family of people of all different sizes and shades. I come from a father with dark skin and a mother of a lighter complexion. I dance bachata and merengue like my life depends on it, eat sancocho on the hottest day of the summer, and drink a nice cool bottle of Country Club red soda. But aside from that, I was born in Newark, NJ; land of the free and home of the Whitney Houston as I like to call it. I lived in Trenton and spent the rest of my childhood in East Windsor, so you can say I'm pretty well rounded. I learn about other cultures surrounding me, and I strive to teach others of the customs I grew up following. While I embrace my roots, I struggled to explain my identity to the blind(someone who cannot see who one truly is).

As a child, I remember that I once thought that I was born in Africa because of the color of my skin. I remember once asking my sister, whose skin is lighter than mine, if we were black or white. Her response was that we were Hispanic, meaning that we were neither black or white. As I grew older, I've had people ask me if I was black or Indian, to which I would say no. They would not believe me unless I spoke Spanish to them. To me, it felt stupid that I had to speak a language, one that I could not speak perfectly, to prove my ethnic and racial background. It got to the point where I would strictly speak Spanish to my friends or I would pronounce Spanish words with an accent to prove that I am Latina.

In high school, I remember witnessing a boy slip and fall during lunch period. As everyone in the cafeteria started to laugh, I walked passed him to my table, only to have him look at me with disgust and call me a dumb Mexican. Not only was I furious, but I was ready to throw myself at him and beat him up.

It is sad when I think of a world where people are being labeled because of how they look. I shouldn't have to explain myself to people of who I am ethnically, only to have people not believe me because they choose to be blinded by the color of my skin rather then look clearly at who I really am.

During the summer, I came across a video on YouTube by MonicaStyle Muse, a dark skin Dominican who received backlash because she tagged herself as a Latina instead of as being an Afro-Latina. Her viewers left comments on a previous video, criticizing that the way that she looks does not meet the expectations of how Dominican women are supposed to be and look like i.e. light skin, soft hair, and an avid Spanish speaker.

After watching the video, I could not help but feel anger towards those comments left by those who were blind to her. As a dark-skin Dominican, I should not have to refer myself as the obvious to please others. I am proud of everything that makes me the person who I am. If the way I present who I am bothers people, then they can kiss the dust that I leave on the ground behind me. I do not live to please people, nor do I expect others to impress me by being what they are not. Why can't we just embrace who we really are? Because we live in a society that does not accept reality.

I feel beautiful in the skin I am in. There could never be another me because I am the only one. No, I do not think highly of myself or others, but I do believe that in order for people to embrace who they really are is to learn how to love themselves. I am a Dominican woman born in New Jersey who loves the traditions she was born into as well as the ones she was raised to learn. I am a Dominican woman who loves Aventura, Ed Sheeran, and Tupac Shakur. I am a Dominican woman who loves eating platano con salami y queso frito and cheeseburgers and fries. Most importantly, I am a Dominican woman. To me, that is who I am; no one can take that away from me.

17 views0 comments
bottom of page